Who Is Evan?

Sam has now been gone for a week and a half. He went with his Tucson Grandparents to Atlanta to visit his cousins. He'll be back on the 31st...just in time to wear the Spiderman costume I scored for him at a church rummage sale for $2 an hour before I was going to go to Target to buy him a Transformer's mask for $8. And, in the process of buying him the Spiderman costume, a friend offered to give me some of her sons' old costumes...she asked what my boys liked and I said, "Bad guys" because I knew that's what Sam would say if he was there.

Since he's been gone, I have gotten to know Evan a little bit better. Here's some things I have learned about him or done with him in Sam's absence:

--Evan is a sloppy-talker. He has been talking to us a lot more with Sam gone because, well, Sam sure talks a lot when he is here. Sometimes I am amazed at how much Evan sounds like Sam, but have also noticed some unique things he says, like: "Afferday" (which means "later"); "Some lots" (which means "Give me a lot of whatever it is I want, like 'Please have some lots of juice'"); when asked if he wants, let's say, milk or water, he says, "Or...milk!" (he always includes the or); he says "Mine Jeremy" when Jeremy is not around ("Where's mine Jeremy?"); also "ou bout (how about) DAT one!" Ou bout is probably his most used phrase; things are "mines" or "thems"; and just yesterday he has started saying, "Need to fussin'" when he wants to cry or complain about something. He was asking us for "Jello-pillow" the other day...we finally figured out he meant marshmallows.

--He is actually more welcoming and hospitable than I had noticed before. The Schwan's delivery man (in his 40's, at least) came to the door to try to sell us some stuff and Evan got all consternated that Jeremy was just standing at the door talking to him. He kept pulling on my leg and saying, "Dat boy needs come in here, okay?" Also, my Uncle and Aunt came to visit from Hawaii and he was very friendly with them...he called my aunt "Aunt Grandma" and wanted to only hold Uncle Jim's hand (he has always like men better than women). (though he did say about my uncle "Don't let that boy eat my cer-e-old (cereal)!")

--He is still a little snobby toward his little sister. Here is an interaction we had:
Me: "Did you know that when you were a little baby like Annie, Sam helped take care of you and gave you lots of kisses?"
Evan: (ignores me)
Me: "Evan, do you love Annie"
Evan: (ignores me)
Me: "Evan, isn't Annie sweet?"
Evan: "Can I have a candy?"

(Notice in this picture...see how she is reaching out for him but he is giving her the cold shoulder? That pretty much sums it up)

The other day, he bumped into my knee under my nursing cover and said, "It Annie's head?" I said no, thinking he was trying to be cautious about bumping her, and then he touched my shoulder and said "Dat Annie's head?" and I said no and showed where her head was and then he...punched her head. And then time out happened, but he still seemed a little smug.

--He is a poop-withholder. When successfully potty-training Sam, I would hear stories of friends' kids who refused to poop on the potty and would hold it until they were given a diaper at night or their ever-vigilant parents looked away for a moment. I felt a little smug myself that Sam wasn't one of these...I still have a cute message saved on my phone when he called from Grandma's house to say he had pooped in the potty (why do parents cherish things like that? so strange!). Now, I feel like I won a bad lottery...I have one of THOSE kids who won't perform no matter how many ice creams, trips to the pet store, trips to the Aquaplex, new toys, special videos, chances to blow out a candle are offered (for some reason, blowing out a candle was very motivating to him one day). Here is a picture of us one morning when we were locked in the bathroom for 2.5 hours with no pants on (Evan, not me) waiting for him to have to go. Notice the thank you notes on the floor that I STILL haven't gotten done.
He did it once that morning and then 2 more times that day in his pants. I aborted the whole project and feel much better about life. I guess he won. I concede defeat in exchange for less laundry.

It's funny how quickly the novelty of having one less child around wore off. I was like, "I can go to the store and do everything I want, this is going to be so easy with just 2 kids" and then Evan sat in the grocery cart cracking eggs through the cart onto the floor (Heard on the intercom as we made our way through the store "Clean up on Aisle 6. Clean up on Aisle 7.") until someone alerted me to what he was doing. Then, while unpacking the groceries, he threw his juice all over them...I think that was the worst place to have thrown it--I hate sticky plastic bags and trying to wipe off every item inside the bags...ugh!

But, we have had some sweet moments together that probably would have been overshadowed by Sam if he had been here. We shared watermelon together and had fun together at our youth group retreat this weekend.


I'm sure he's thinking "Too bad that BABY is still here getting in the way." That BABY, by the way, is just really cute!
Here she is in her swing:
I am finding that I am more concerned about her fashion than my own, lately. I remember worrying that her outfit in the above picture didn't match well enough...and we didn't even go anywhere that day!

Despite my best intentions to use my time effectively, my floors are still dirty and my car still looks like a homeless person's, but I am enjoying this time with Evan and Annie, and I know I will really appreciate Sam when he gets back from his long trip. And, I wouldn't have been able to have such a good time with Jeremy at the youth group retreat this weekend with 3 kids instead of 2.
Now I think I smell a stinky diaper from the stinker so I better go change it. Yuck..

CAKE! and the Nature of Memories

I'm not going to start posting recipes here because I have lots of friends(jessieheaviland.blogspot.com) who do it much better than me, but I HAVE to share this recipe. It is my new best friend...I mean favorite (I don't find emotional comfort in chocolate, really). It is from the Betty Crocker cookbook I got when I got married. Here it is:

Double Chocolate Snack Cake

1 2/3 cups flour
1 cup brown sugar or white sugar (I use brown or mix half and half)
1/4 cup baking cocoa
1 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1 cup water
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1 tsp. white vinegar
1/2 tsp. vanilla
1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips (optional)
Powdered sugar (optional)

1. Heat oven to 350 degrees.
2. Mix flour, brown sugar, cocoa, baking soda, and salt with a fork in ungreased square pan, 8x8x2 inches. Stir in remaining ingredients except choc. chips and powdered sugar. Sprinkle choc. chips over batter.
3. Bake 35-40 minuntes or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool in pan on wire rack. Sprinkle with powdered sugar.
4. Don't eat it all at once!

That last instruction I added for my own sake. None of you would actually do that. Okay, but because of my disclaimer about not posting recipes, you absolutely have to try this one! It is so good and sooo easy! I have made it 4 times in the last 2 weeks (blushing slightly)...don't worry, 2 times were for birthdays and one was for company. I have made it as cupcakes (excellent--I left out the choc. chips and only cooked them for about 18 min.), I usually double it and have replaced half the oil with applesauce and reduced the sugar and they still turn out great. It doesn't sink in the middle, which is good for a recipe at high altitude. Oh, and I don't mix them directly in the pan because I don't think that washing ONE bowl is that big of a deal. I have started using more recipes with cocoa and less with chocolate chips since Jeremy's grandmother pointed out how much more cost effective it is to use cocoa. These have just a few choc. chips, so they last longer (or there are more for me to eat by the handful when the kids aren't looking).

Here is a picture of Evan enjoying the chocolate cake in cupcake form.
See, he is a chip off the old block--getting drunk on chocolate.

In other news, I had been second-guessing my decision to not to put Sam in any kind of school this year. Here's a downside to having 3 kids at home together all day:


Here's the upside:


And this:


It is so fun watching Sam and Evan become such good friends. I think it shows what is special between siblings...they are best friends and often don't know it. It might take them a long time to recognize it, but they are one of God's best gifts to each other. I have one of those gifts, too.
(Check out the wallpaper behind us. Yes, that's my room and I had that wallpaper up until I got married. That's why you don't let a junior higher choose their own wallpaper.)


So, I am sad that Samuel isn't at school with his friends and has to be in the lower age Sunday School class at church, but in the long run, I think it is better for him and Evan to be closer in school and have mutual friends. I'm tempted to be the pushy mom and try to get special permission for him to do the things the kindergartners are doing, but I think I will sit back and see what happens.

Another upside to having all the kids home together was having a morning like we had yesterday. It was nothing extraordinary...it was rainy and started with a dentist's appointment for Sam, but then we decided to go for a drive until the library opened. We talked a lot in the car and went past where we used to live when Sam was 2. We stopped and picked apples at the apple tree that he used to play under and shared memories. (The tree seemed to be growing well after Sam's watering over 2 years ago. He's was potty training, wet pants were the only other option.)
(On the grass outside our old apartment)

We went on to the library and saw a friend from college, a church friend, and some MOPS friends. It reminded me of an old Girl Scouts song about old and new friends being like silver and gold. We were having such a nice time, we stayed for storytime. We even found a book about a little girl with BROWN hair named Annie. Evan carefully carried it all the way to the car. I felt really blessed.

I suppose these events aren't really worth reporting...and they actually sound more exciting in the retelling (picking apples, for example, was looking for apples in the tree and then realizing they were all too high to reach, so we (I) found some good ones on the ground). But, I guess that's the nature of good memories. I think they grow more "good" in your mind over time, but I don't think that's a bad thing. It's why my boys enjoy going to the library so much. They don't remember the times we left early because someone pooped their pants or that I was impatient with them because I just wanted to sit on the chair and read a magazine. They love telling their Grandmas and Grandpas on the phone what they did that day, and only then do I often realize how special the time really was.

So, I guess that's why I write this blog entry with (literally) 6 piles of laundry and an unpacked suitcase in the house. I don't want to forget these ordinary memories, and I want to record them so they can grow more golden over time. I wish there was a way to record in writing the wonderful sound of the giggles I heard coming from the bathtub earlier this evening. I'll just have to treasure that one in my heart.